Bum On The Street

Television
30 seconds

by Leo L. Schwab
9410.11

Notes

This is a less-direct ripoff of the MGA television ad, which also skewers an individual who richly deserves it.

Exterior day. Urban city street. Disheveled BUM stands uncertainly on the sidewalk, leaning against a wall. Well-dressed INTERVIEWER enters view.

Interviewer

Pardon me, sir. What do you do for a living?

Bum

(half-coherent) I'm chairman of Commodore International.

Cut to wider shot of INTERVIEWER and BUM. In the foreground stands a table holding several (three?) objects, each covered with a black cloth. Attending to these is a stereotypically scantily-clad female ASSISTANT.

Interviewer

Well, we were hoping you could help us illustrate a point by choosing the interactive entertainment system you like most.

Bum

(pointing) Um, that one.

Interviewer

(oblivious) ...Proving you don't need to be an electronics genius to know our system is best.

Bum

(irritated) That one!

ASSISTANT unveils selected machine.

Bum

(reading slowly through blurred eyes) Three - dee - oh. (muttering to himself) I've heard of that somewhere...

Interviewer

Yes, the 3DO Interactive Multiplayer. The most advanced interactive home entertainment system in the known universe.

Bum

(distantly confused) Don't we compete with you?

Interviewer

(smugly) Ah, no.

Fade to black.

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Copyright © 1996 Leo L. Schwab. All Rights Reserved.